(no subject)

Happy New Year to everyone! I have been physically absent from my computer for some time so I haven't had time to catch up with you all.

So I ended 2014 exactly where I was when 2013 ended. Unemployed and broke. I was let go two days ago plus my roommate shorted me again. Though it was a Christmas miracle that she got me $500 instead of the usual $100 "I'll get you the rest later" runaround.

I am a hair away from just becoming a functioning alcoholic at the rate this is going at. Why is it so hard for me to find stable work?

I haven't felt so awful and zapped in quite a while. I did have a lot of recurring thoughts which did end up with me in a lake somewhere, and I'm still trying to quell those. I have no idea how I will keep going.

I think I'm just so upset and tired because my best efforts have resulted in everything blowing up in my face. And when things come up, people attack my very personality. Plus being in the same spot I was before, but worse, and faced with the very real threat of homelessness.

Should I just start selling off all my belongings? I don't know.

Anyway, here's to 2015 and my attempts to turning it around.